If You Follow Me… (Some Jokes From Oz)

All the way from Brisbane…

 

It Don’t Add Up

Literacy and numeracy are the issues that employers are most concerned about. You might of guessed but did you know that four out of three people today struggle with basic maths?

 

Not so Tweet!

A good friend of mine who had recently succumbed to pressure from his kids, and all his old pals (including me!), to become computer literate has taken to the Internet like a duck to water. Who’d have thought that dear old Molesworth would actually enjoy surfing the net? Not only does he have the most expensive modern Mac computer, a tablet and an Ipad, he also has the latest Samsung Galaxy Smartphone.

Did I hear you ask if he knows how to use them? I’ll say! In fact, in next to no time he has developed something of a problem. Only yesterday I bumped into him in Oxford Street (he had his head down, looking at his Smartphone) and I laughed.

“It’s not funny,” old Molesworth had an air of misery about him even greater than I could recall, “you see, I’m afraid I have developed an addiction and, in fact, I’ve just been to see a therapist.”

“So sorry to hear it old chap. What kind of addiction, if you don’t mind talking about it?”

“Well, it was quite unnerving – Sylvia has threatened to divorce me if I don’t seek help so you can imagine the severity of my addiction – you see I had to send myself along to this so-called addiction therapist?”

I nodded, almost dreading what was coming next.

“Well, I came right out with it. ‘I’m addicted to Twitter!’ I told him and do you know he replied?”

“No Mouldy (his nickname at school), I haven’t a clue.”

“Well, he said ‘I’m sorry but I don’t follow you!”

 

And lastly…

To be Succinct

A lawyer is the only man who can write a ten thousand word document and call it a brief!

 

 

 

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